Getting out of a narcissistic relationship is a difficult experience. Narcissistic people often take up a lot of our energy in romantic relationships, and often lead to a painful and emotional breakup when we are finally able to leave.
If you’ve gotten out of a narcissistic relationship, chances are you are hesitant to get back into the dating world. The good news is, though, it is very possible to have a healthy and happy relationship following a previous one with a narcissistic person.
Once you are ready to begin dating again, you will want to educate yourself on narcissistic personality tendencies and what to look for in a budding relationship to help you avoid narcissistic individuals. Being able to identify red flags and troubling signs will ensure you are entering into a healthy, happy relationship. Here are some of the key things to keep top of mind as you are starting to meet new people:
Beware of Love Bombing
When your narcissistic relationship began, your partner may have been continuously showering you in love and affection all hours of the day. Saying “I love you” just a few days into the relationship, sending countless overly affectionate text messages, or showering you with tons of gifts can be a sign of love bombing.
Though isolated these actions may seem harmless, an overwhelming amount of them can be a cause for concern. Especially early on in a relationship, these forms of affection may not match the amount of time or seriousness of the relationship. If your new partner is displaying potential signs of love bombing, try to take the time to discuss these instances with a trusted friend or family member. They will be able to help you identify if these are genuine actions, or if they truly are engaging in love bombing.
Take it Slow
After being in a bad relationship for a long period of time, it is natural to want to jump into something fresh and new to restore your faith in love. Though this sounds good in theory, in practice it may not be the healthiest thing for you.
Narcissistic relationships take a lot out of us emotionally, and require a certain level of time and energy to heal. After you’ve taken some time to rebuild yourself, and feel comfortable reentering the dating scene, you will want to make sure you are taking it slow. As you are dating new people, take the time to evaluate their personality and how they are as people. Gaining your trust over time is more valuable and sustainable than immediately going head-first into a relationship without establishing that trusting bond.
Stand Your Ground
Over the course of a relationship with a narcissist, you may have been forced to forego a lot of things that were important to you. Your own activities and hobbies, relationships with friends and family, as well as preferences for your romantic relationship may have been compromised over the course of dating this individual.
As you are beginning to date again, be sure to identify the key things that are most important to you for you to live a healthy and fulfilling life. When it comes to dating, you will want to establish boundaries and expectations with your new partner related to how you deserve to be treated throughout your relationship, and what things are and are not okay with you. Establishing these expectations and standing your ground will ensure you are staying true to yourself, and advocating for your needs throughout your relationship. This will help you to grow a healthy relationship where you and your partner both feel fulfilled and heard